July 19, 2013

Choice of words…

Choice of using ‘and’ instead of ‘but’

Our words are very powerful. The words we use are reflective of our unconscious choices (whether we like them or not).

So when we use the word “but” it can be limiting our opportunities to succeed and be happy in life.

“I love my child, but I don’t like it when he does not listen to me.”

“I love my job, but I wish I had more money.”

”This is interesting, but I don’t think it will work”

The examples can go on forever. Unconsciously, the word “but” creates a separation between the two things we’re talking about.

In the examples above, It can lead us to unconsciously self-sabotage our efforts at success and happiness. Maybe not in huge ways, but at least in little ways.

We may not not even understand why we feel frustrated or “slightly agitated.” This is the nature of feeling separate from things. It causes disharmony.

That’s why whenever possible, it would be useful to use the word “and” to bridge things. For example:

“I love him AND look forward to connecting with him in different ways to understand what he is thinking.”

“I love my job AND am making empowering choices to create more financial abundance in my life.”

Simply by using the word “and” literally orients the brain towards POSSIBILITY. Towards OPPORTUNITY.

Everything that follows “and” in those sentences orients towards positive empowered thinking.

“But” is a word that, by its very nature, is limiting. “But” actually orients our brains towards scarcity, limitation, and maybe even fear.

“And” by its very nature is expanding and inclusive.

From now on, whenever you find yourself about to use the word “but” pause for a moment and ask yourself a simple question:

“What other words express my thoughts or feelings more positively?”

Chances are, you’ll be able to find an “and” in there somewhere.

We can make the choice of using ‘and’ and ‘but’ in our communication. We use ‘but’ only when necessary 🙂

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